Once more blurring the line between the campaign as high-meta Kaufmannesque "comedy" and, as Bumiller sees it, the campaign as paean to ineptitude, John McCain was in Columbus, Ohio's German Village yesterday at a place known as Schmidt's Restaurant und Sausage Haus. OMFG. I can't stop peeing my pants. BHO was in another place, doing something else. Whatever it was, it was not funny.
Walnuts even gave a press conference in front of a sign that apparently said "Fudge Haus." I couldn't read it from the AP video, because of the tacky gold paint and faux-Gothic lettering.
While there, he was able to sample the "Bahama Mama sausage and jumbo cream puffs." Perhaps at the same time.
While Barry unfurled a cosmic vision of brothers and sisters breaking boundaries, John ate a quarter-pound stick of swirly marshmallow fudge, saying, "Here, in my mouth, ebony and ivory live in perfect harmony," and "People, listen. Fudge knows no boundaries."
In reality, McCain was there to woo German-Americans, a key demographic unfortunately alienated by the 1930s crackdown on German-lanugage schools, the elimination of German community groups and sympathizers like the Silver Shirts, the mocking of German cuisine, and the firebombing of Dresden.
Columbus resident Otto Schneemann reflected on this: "Above all, the will of the people, including our demand for living-space (lebensraum), must be met and adhered to!"
Ohh, I can only laugh but so much. The midwest is a crazy Teutonic place, full of hunting lodges, deer heads, red leather. Among the populace, a grim hunger for the apocalypse. Faced with this lala-land, McCain could either walk Lindsey Graham around on a leash with a knife in his own teeth, or suck it up and face the wurst. The awful wurst...
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